Figuring Things Out

This past week has taken a long time to end.  It started last Sunday when I got dressed for church.  Normally I throw a skirt on and am out the door in a few minutes, but last Sunday I actually took my time. I put on make up. Okay just mascara and lip gloss but that is more than I usually do. And I did my hair. I never do my hair- its always in a pony tail.  Anyway, I did all this for a stupid reason. Yeah. A boy. When said person didn't say a word to me at church, I kicked myself all through Relief Society.  But that's not the part I gave up at. That happened Monday when I went to a social event.  During that hour and a half I was there I felt older than everyone else. I AM older than all the others, by at least three years. I'm not saying I am the most mature person but I certainly felt my 25 years.  After three straight days of clinicals and another institute class where the same thing pretty much happened, I remembered why I stayed home so many Monday nights at BYU. Awkwardness is pretty much me in a big group of people. I never know what to say so I don't say anything. And then I end up coming off as mad or something. But what I figured out this week is patience. I need to have patience in so many things in my life. School. My nephew. And becoming more social. I know I won't be the girl talking to everyone at church tomorrow, but I'll smile. And if that boy doesn't talk to me tomorrow or the rest of the time I'm here, I'll live.